The Structure of Your Happiness

My favorite quote is from Aristotle.  The gist is that excellence, ought to be a habit and not an act. 

I learned a few years ago, the hard way, that what you repeatedly do is the important thing.  Motivation, being the fickle thing that it is, cannot be relied on. You’ve got to set up your life in such a way as to make yourself happy. 

It is also important to know that pretty much the whole world is going to disagree with you about what this looks like.  After all, your boss has been trying to get you back to that 60+ hour work week since the start of 1900s.  Your partner and friends may not want you to do it.  Customers want you 24/7. 

What is really important?  Your family?  Your health?  Your purpose?  How does one answer these questions?  It is simple:  your repeated actions reflect your values.  It is that simple.

Since the world is going to ask you to do its bidding, you’ll want to think about how to take “no” out of the equation.  If you don’t, you’ll constantly be weighing the pros and cons of what is presented in the moment.  You’ll occasionally make good choices, but you won’t look like any person of integrity.

One of my best teachers for this has been working out: my workouts are almost always done at the same time.  Mental health management is because I listen to podcasts/audiobooks the same time every day.  Katy and I schedule dates.  I call my dad the same time every week.  I could go on. 

You are what you repeatedly do.  Think very hard about your habits.  This is actually more important than thinking about good choices.  For example, what I do (good) and what I don’t do (bad), aren’t because I’m disciplined.  Those things are because they’re habituated. 

I still make bad choices.  We all do.  But, I’ve been tweaking my habits for the better part of a decade.  While everyone likes vacations, I like getting back home to my routines.  They are just that important.  Thoughtfully structure your life and you will structure your happiness.